The mind fears extinction. The mind fears extinction of its worlds of form. If you can’t imagine infinitely more, imagine unimaginably imaginable. Incomprehensible. The mind wants to reign supreme. The 1st identification is with form. The mind creates conflict with what is. It is stupid to get angry at stupid things. The mind fights for survival, against its extinction, for its beliefs and structures, for the imagining of its creations presented as truth, for its integration of all things as seen as reality. The one king connection, the one key cultural belief and delusion is this: you are your mind.
Mediocrity is not enough. God essence. You are not your mind, you are something more. An awakening of Earth consciousness is required for survival. The economy benefits from unconsciousness, the media created realm of fear-panic. If you are fearful, there will be a product for you. Do you have a sophisticated fear? Then buy an Audi. Have you a rudimentary fear? Then buy fast food. The narrative is this: we live in a world of language. We are human beings. Consciousness is expressed through a myriad of forms. Identification of mind and creation of ego cloud true connectivity to Being. Donate to charity. Understand your ego identify is not real in the sense that it is not timeless. Ego is fiction. It is the mind state activation, but remember that you are not mind. Conflicts arise between egos. Identities of the collective ego war. It is the unconscious fear of losing identity. Beyond mind, beyond this. I understand very little of what I am saying. These are words on a screen typed from words on a page written in a half realized dream. These are the attempts at self-realization. It is the un-earthing of something else entirely. The foundation of past exists in mind, in psychological time. I am not past, I say. And I am not future, I say. I try not to over-think but almost always already fail. Between brief cycles of no-mind, there is more analysis. I believe that there are answers in language. I believed, I want to say I used to believe, but alas, more fictions. The desired peace is another want. I want. I. And maybe freedom from that want would create the desired thing. And what is happiness? Perhaps dependent on circumstance and quite different from the joy from simply Being.
And once machines, then robots, things without souls.
Identities addicted to form. Deep within you, in the stillness, timeless reality I cannot think of exists that which animates form. These are the half ripped, stained pages of time. Train your mind. How can I train my mind, I ask. The miseries I believe I feel are half created, I say. The suicidal thoughts are realized fictions given fuel by time. Language is but a match. How can we become gods if not in death and realize the enchanted realities only dreamed of in fantasies? Imagine the individuals that ask god for nothing, but these individuals who became what the situation needed. From human to god. From abandonment, from nothing, from pain, to infinitely more. It is self-trust. You know you are connected to the universe in some way, shape, or from. You are connected to the universe. Believe this fully if only for perhaps the sole reason that it may be the only anchor in a fleeting reality.
What is the price of time?
Do not believe that you are above the process.
The ego is not the witness.
And perhaps this is why there is so much resistance from mind. The mind has spent a lifetime crafting narratives of and for realities of family, friends, culture, time, nation, world, language, et cetera. To die would be a terrible fate. The mind must insist that its narratives are correct and that the world is wrong. And when the mind identified state is so fully in pain, there are very few options. Emotions feel and seem real, but they are rooted in the initial errors of the mind identified state. One can accept Being beyond mind or continue believing the identified fictions of the collective delusion. And even if one would seem inclined to move or sway in one direction or another, it is safe to say that there is very little shelter. They say pain transforms. Salvation is not in ego. One must die before one dies– that is, to mind identified states of form. However, the ego is clever. It seeks survival at the cost of its host. I stopped counting the times I have been led through that narrow road, crawling for salvation. Endlessly thinking. And I would like to say that is simply the problem: thinking. Then again, I think more and believe there may be some truth on a practical plane and we begin the dance once again. The severity of suicidal depression varies according to time, and yet dissolves with acceptance. Surrender, they say. Don’t fight the mind. It is a fiction of the station of mind and trains of thoughts. The mind has identified with its past and yet it has not identified with what is beyond it. The mind cannot conceive of its own existence where it is not at center. The mind believes in fragmentation, alienation, and its pain. The world is pain, it says (but only because it cannot imagine something else entirely).
And still, the ego accepts surrender partially and remains.
You will be fine if you let go.
You believe you are not enough and project others’ judgments. The ego believes it will solve problems by worrying. When the ego creates emotions, it believes its foundations to be rooted in the real when in reality it is rooted in projections and mind stuff. These thoughts can be overcome by surrender. Believe in surrender. Understand the depth of love, the insufferable death of mind identified states.